"If you are an overeducated (or at least a semi-overeducated) youngish person with a sleep disorder and a surfeit of opinions, the thing to do, after all, is to start a blog." NYT, 09.12.05

Friday, September 30, 2005

Newscope

I love it when people send "anonymous" emails from their Kenyon account.

Dear Newscope, I am a long time reader of your publication and I do find it very helpful, but I do have a concern. Is it really necessary to print in every issue that MiddleGround is open from 8:00am-12:00am? This seems like something that would be useful at the beginning of the year but after a while it seems like a huge waste of ink since you guys print like 50 copies of the Newscope every time you put out a new one. Maybe if you could explain your reasoning for doing so I would be more understanding but it just seems unnessecary.

Sincerely, A Newscope reader.
-------------------------------

Hmmm, considering the salary that both Alycia and I draw, I think that the costs of paper and labor far outweigh the costs of ink. I would point to space and aesthetic considerations, but not ink.

Also, I'm confused. Why does my devoted reader to "be more understanding?"

KB Squared-- the inside scoop

What possessed me to reduce my relationship to Karly to a world shared by others? Three recent examples:

1. Writing about her in essays. For example, "My identical twin and I fueled each other’s desire to compete as individuals but serve as members of a greater community."

Note: this has also meant discussing this content to OTHER PEOPLE, viz. professors. This has also meant that details of our lives have gone public. Apparently, we share the trait of making our personal statement not personal enough....

2. Watching how we speak when others are around. Apparently, twin speak is classified as a foreign language to some.

3. Agreeing to be on an admissions panel in a few weeks to discuss having a sibling on campus. Both of us are inexplicably on this panel, so it will be like cross-talk on cnn. a "discussion" with 20-20 hindsight.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

borders of our lives

I've slacked off quite a bit these last few days. It's produced the odd situation where I have seen few people multiple times but many people a few times. Conversation topics? Anything from life back on the hill to Teach for America to the movie "Sideways."

Interesting sidenote (a la Gilbert or B2): Sideways was directed by Alexander Payne, who also directed "Election." Election was the first movie that I actually had to stop watching because I couldn't stand it anymore. Also of note: A favorite book of mine, "A Separate Peace," is read aloud in "Sideways."

Last night I found myself asking "Why do I read?" I write too many personal statements these days to believe that this can be answered. Sincerity, if included in the first draft, could be edited for the sake of brevity. [There's a good Michael Chabon quote at the end of Wonder Boys about reading through pages looking for the parts that sound true.]

So, I read in order to relax, to learn about the world, to learn how others perceive the world.

Revision: I read in order to escape. I read to forget other responsibilities or that I even have responsibilities to a particular class. I read to live vicariously and forget who I am. And then I read because my obsession kicks in and I can't think about anything else but that fabulous, gripping book. Which is something that my beloved vanilla coke cannot provide.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

New blog

Interesting blog. When I get the chance, I will try to post it in the links section. For all those interested in international health care.

http://effectmeasure.blogspot.com/

Thursday, September 15, 2005

memo that

I don't think that I will ever understand the internet or how search engines work. Just read an email that told me to do a search on google for the word "failure." The results? The belief that politics are everywhere.

Speaking of politics, I started reading a biography of Queen Elizabeth I, by J.E. Neale. A fascinating read. My other current read is "Curious Incident of a Dog in the Nighttime," by Mark Haldon. One of those books that I've been meaning to read for a year and only now reading. Would have finished it by now if I actually picked it up each day before 1am....

Sunday, September 11, 2005

Conversations

Yes, I really do have a child-sized foot. I can't help it. However, I do think that I know how to buy shoes so that they aren't too small or too large. Last night, I went to visit some "friends" and one girl told me that my foot is not that small. I should really be wearing women-sized shoes because my foot was not that much smaller than hers. Perhaps I just wear shoes that are too small for me and have been doing so since fourth grade. Go figure.

On another note, here is an article for potential new authors:.

I also decided to write a book oene day. Humorous accounts of being a twin. Earlier this week, someone told me that I could be a soap opera. Public affairs writing is that cheesy. Friend said that we are like a schizophrenic. First one talk, then the other. But it sounds like the same person. Not so, but funny nonetheless.

Saturday, September 10, 2005

Tale of two moods

Thursday: I had an absolutely amazing day on Thursday. I don't know why, but I loved it. I had 3.5 hours of sleep the previous night, but I couldn't do anything to stop smiling. I had this tremendous bounce in my step, and nothing could deter my good mood. Nothing spectacular or even memorable occurred, but the entire day was great. I split the entire day between my lab work and TA'ing and then band. However, it was just one of those amazing days in which I want to dance down Middle Path. Life for no explicable reason was just that good.

Saturday: I went running this morning, which is not good in itself. I run in order to be fit or to clear my head. Approximately three miles of pavement and the sound of the wind. I needed to run away from my planner and the thousands of meetings and labs. I needed to run away from the applications yet undone. Above all, I needed time away from Kenyon. SIPS last night was great, but not enough. Right now, I just see too much drama, where everyone hears only half of the story (especially when it involves the opposite sex) and then when you do hear the other half, you just end up hurt. Really hurt. Basically, I'm at the point where two friends are causing me more stress than the rest of my crazy life put together. Everyone is acting like twelve years old and no one is being truthful. I fee like I'm the excuse for someone's else's insecurities, and I haven't even seen the players in days. Which is why I'm in hiding and trying to figure out where to go for October Break. This campus is too small and enclosed right now.

Friday, September 02, 2005

Random news

Classes started this week. While I'm not going to think about the loads of work and my home away from home, I should share amusing stories.

Every as a little kid asks "why is water blue?" Adults can explain that lakes and rivers are not really blue; merely their coloring is the reflection of the sky. This leads to the inevitable question, "why is the sky blue?"

Now I demonstrate my nerdy side, minus the nerdy glasses. Reading my instrumental analysis book, I can now say that the sky is blue as a result of the Rayleigh scattering. Shorter wavelengths from the sun's radiation scatter when they reach the atmospheric medium. As these shorter wavelengths are in the visible region, we see the scattered waves in the sky as blue. Thus, a blue sky.

Tonight the power went off across Gambier, just before 9pm. Little surprise that I was reading my textbook and working on the computer. To make a long story short, Prof. Lutton loaned four of us students his flashlight and a propane lamp. The four of us dragged a table and chairs out of a lounge and sat and studied by the light of an emergency light and the propane lamp.

As this is Kenyon, a couple friends came by and tried to argue that since power was out, it was a good excuse as any to start drinking. Somehow the excuse that it was early in the night sounded quite lame. I stuck with my coffee and milk and biology textbook.

To end the excitement, the lights came back on around 11pm. It was a bit humorous to hide matches and the propane lamp in the biochemistry lab. Kelly didn't want to set off the smoke detectors either in the restroom and was in a momentary panic.

Enough talk now. Time to read about the principles of democracy.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

Sex, drugs, and rock and roll

In some ways, I guess that you could say that I'm sexually frustrated. Everywhere I look, someone is talking about sex. I'm overwhelmed and frankly, a little tired of the topic. Just because I'm naive doesn't necessarily mean that I want or need to know the ins and outs of the 1000 ways to copulate. Preferably, my mind needs to be out of the gutter at the moment. Just too many voices speaking about it. Conversations with friends at Kenyon, a cabaret, and even the NY Times. Well, sort of.

In general, too much information. Way too many details.

Think I will go and improve my physical chemistry. Of the math variety.

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Desiderata

Karly is on page 6 out of 60, so I will post the poem she wanted:

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others,
even to the dull and ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter,
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be.
And whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

Max Ehrman, 1927

Friday, August 26, 2005

a new Kenyon tradition

I've become a flagbearer for life. Walking through the faculty on Middle Path next May will be the sixth time that I have walked through them. Three convocations and two commencements thus far.

In a way, I'm sad. A professor told me this year that the procession is not merely about tradition but also about the individual quirks that make each march unique. Three of flag processions have paired me with Kar. I admit that there's something humorous about a pair of identical twins leading the faculty. The flags are twice our height. I once caught the American flag on a tree branch. I've learned to wear a miniskirt under the robes and to look backwards and watch for the professory emeritus of physics.

I've had many conversations with senior faculty with whom I have never had class. Today Mr. Lentz and I discussed Cahokia. In a way, I really do love this tradition. Carrying the flag is an honor and one of my favorite oddball traditions on a campus, superstitutious for the 8th floor Caples and the unsanitary post at the Gates of Hell.

Today was great.

Saturday, August 20, 2005

Tales from suburbia

Today, I nearly finished the neurotic epic called "packing for college." After sitting on my third medium-sized suitcase/duffel bag, I looked out the window around lunchtime and saw my lovely stepbrother pull into the driveway. Home from summer school, no doubt. Another car pulls up, this time with a blonde stereotypic of my hometown. It's misting outside, so the two chat for awhile before getting into her car to continue chatting.

No, it would never occur to him to enter the house. His stepsisters, who "have no social life" (his words earlier this year) are home. But as he later told his dad, this was his lunch break and he did come inside to nap.

Some nap.

My bedroom window has one of the few views of the driveway and the cul-de-sac where the girl's car is parked. The car windows get fogged, reminiscent of Titanic, so the kids stop to defog. We look out again.

Boy-meet-girl.
Boy and girl have hormones.
PG/PG-13 situation.

In a cul-de-sac.

Viewed from a window this is undoubtedly testimony that would not hold up in a court of law, apart from the false assurances that the boy did come into the house.

Moral of the story: with the rocky history of the stepbrother, should parents or stepbrother be told?

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Overheard...

... at the ballgame:
"Oooh, it's the kiss-cam. I love it! Let's practice!"


... on the streets:
"I'm feeling more liberal these days. I don't understand why."

"It's ok not to be conservative."


... on shopping at Target (online):
""The external experience is about shopping," she writes. "The internal, emotional experience is about being validated, and treated with respect.""


... in Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince:
"I think that I'm good looking enough for both of us!" (Fleur Delacour)

Monday, August 15, 2005

back in the old world

Wish I had time to write a substantial blog entry, but unfortunately my internet connection is slow and my computer battery is low. A brief update: Kelly and I finished our road trip across the tri-state area. 771.6 miles later and having seen relatives from all sides, it will be about time to head out for our fall road trip across the eastern states of the midwest. Fun times.

From shopping to chewing wheat gum to dance lessons, it's been quite a trip.

Saturday, August 06, 2005

a trip north

Funny, I've managed to hit pretty much all of the "must-see" sights in Duluth, Minnesota and a few more. Not that I went to the tequila bar or anything of course. But the ore boats and the Depot are old favorites. As are Enger Tower, Skyline Parkway, and the cute little breakfast/pub place whose name escapes me. The Congdon mansion reminds of the board game, Clue, at any rate.

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

work hard, play hard

Repeatedly, I'm reminded of this creed. A friend of mine has apparently lately said that his motto is, in the tradition of Clark Gable, "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a ----." Based on my last few weeks, my motto would certainly mirror a more high-powered lifestyle. I've pulled some crazy hours in lab, with alternating tears and giggles. Take Saturday.

Study hard: Stayed up Friday night and talked literally till dawn. Slept for a couple hours before heading to lab. Worked on my poster (whose accompanying frustrations are too tortuous to mention) for five hours. No time for breakfast or lunch.

Play hard: Saturday's fun had to be an all or nothing affair, at least for me. The Zoo is huge, so no oliphants. Felt extremely lighthearted from the sun since I hadn't eaten, but the fruit smoothie that someone gave me sure helped. However, at the Hard Rock Cafe, I certainly ate enough for the entire day.


Digression: Penguins remind me of tuxedos, or is it the other way around? Posted by Picasa

Above all, playing hard on Saturday meant the City Museum. It's essentially a playground for big kids... with enchanted caves and a skateless skate park. Meaning running and climbing without stopping. Banging my head against the ceiling. Squeezing my butt through holes and muttering "shit, shit" every two steps as I crawled through a wire tunnel three stories above the ground. [Heights make me dizzy.] Just the incessent need to move and revel in the moment until one drops from exhaustion.

Someone called this place the "poster child on steroids" for the level of recycling and reusing of old materials that occurs. Needless to say, I had to include some pictures.



We climbed down this at the City Museum. Posted by Picasa



I called this a sundial. Posted by Picasa



It was actually quite easy to climb into the mouth of the great white whale (a la Moby Dick). Posted by Picasa



The adventurous group after a hard night's play. We're sitting on the elephant tree. See the tusks? Posted by Picasa

In some ways, this single day is indicative of all my days. Busy, active, enviable, and I'll hate it and love it and would do it again. But what would life be like without this?

Thursday, July 28, 2005

a cure for the common cold

So echinacea isn't the golden panacea we thought it was. The best remedy for colds still remains to wash your hands and to drink gallons and gallons of orange juice. I'm impressed with the people who volunteered to have cold viruses "dripped down their noses." Suffering for five days with a cold (even if handsomely compensated) doesn't sound like too much fun.

New England Journal of Medicine

doubt

It's disappointing to read a fabulous review of a new Broadway show and not know whether it's coming to a theater near you. Or at the very least, know that you will be in a town long enough to go to the theater.

But Doubt sounds fabulous. The central theme sounds like an amazing topic to explore. One-word titles must be in vogue. Proof. Contact.

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

flu season

Oh dear. The problems associated with drug delivery, vaccines, genetics, cross-species dangers, and public health all merge together in influenza.

I'm starting to think that infectious disease is the place to be. Especially when one considers the non-bacteria world.

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

a great big nuclear furnace

Facts to consider:

To date: the high for the month in July in St. Louis has been 98 degrees F, with a low of 58. The average high has been (gasp) a steamy 91 degrees while the low seems a balmy 71.

I borrowed this from the National Weather Service for the St. Louis area....

...TEMPERATURES ARE EXPECTED TO RISE QUICKLY INTO THE MID AND UPPER 90S BY EARLY TUESDAY AFTERNOON WITH HEAT INDICES RISING ABOVE 105 DEGREES FOR THE SEVENTH CONSECUTIVE DAY.

It's no longer a steam iron outside. St. Louis has become a convectional oven.